Borage

I never decided this is what I should do with my life. I just started doing it. And the dogs wouldn’t let me stop.

In the year 2000, I began giving dog mushing presentations in schools and public libraries. 2020 was supposed to be our big 20th anniversary celebration—Noggin, Chloe, and I had planned on being on the road much of the year. 

Indiana, Kentucky, Arkansas, Louisiana, Texas, New Mexico, Colorado, Wyoming, North Dakota, South Dakota, Kansas, Missouri, Illinois, Michigan, Ohio, New York, Connecticut, Massachusetts, Rhode Island, New Hampshire, and Vermont—those were the states we’d either visited already in 2020 or had on the books for later in the year. In early March, we were just preparing to leave for 40 days worth of talks on the East Coast when the pandemic hit.

For every single person on this planet, 2020 was supposed to look one way—and suddenly, it looked another. Instantly, I was unemployed. I had never heard of Zoom. I’ve always hesitated to implement innovations just because they are new and available—ideally, I want technological advances to prove they’ll make my life and the world a better place, not just different. Zoom and other virtual platforms became essential overnight; I was leery, but with the training and support of teachers and librarians, I signed on.

Twenty years ago I began my career of public speaking after falling in love with Alaskan huskies and mushing, an ancient form of dog-powered transportation dating back over 3,000 years. My dream was to train a group of dogs to someday run the 1,049-mile Iditarod Sled Dog Race across Alaska. An event steeped in Indigenous subsistence cultures, mining and Alaskan state history, and a deep respect for working animals, Joe Redington, Sr. came up with the Iditarod—the Last Great Race—in the 1970’s when the widespread use of snowmobiles for winter travel threatened to make dog mushing obsolete. Along with the Iditarod, many other races in Alaska, the Lower 48, Canada, and other countries such as Norway and Russia continue to keep the sled dog lifestyle active and vibrant across the world. 

Since that first Iditarod Race in 1973, there have been many improvements that have made the age-old sport faster, safer, and better for dogs and humans, alike. But, overall, mushers know better than to rely on technology as savior—this is one of many reasons audiences of all ages are enamored with the idea of the Iditarod. It’s just a snowy trail, a team of powerful and enthusiastic dogs, a simple sled packed with food and basic survival gear, and you, a musher. 

During my first four years of school and library talks, I traveled the country with my beloved dog, Borage, my first wooden toboggan sled and gear, 50 lbs. worth of arctic clothing (all I might need to stay warm on the trail), and my parents’ 1970’s Kodak Carousel 600 Slide Projector. 

While my friends were busy buying the latest computers, cell phones, and GPS’s, I saved my pennies to purchase what most might consider needs-from-another-era (or planet) like a lighter-weight aluminum sled, an endless supply of dog booties, and new blades for the ban-saw I ran daily to cut up whole, frozen beaver carcasses donated by a local fur trapper to help feed the kennel. I never even considered replacing the Kodak slide projector I used for my talks with something more modern—this basic yet effective tool served its purpose just fine. If it ain’t broke, I don’t fix it.

Carol Meeks, a teacher from North Manchester, Indiana, was one of the first to invite Borage and me into her classroom. Long before the Internet, Carol had been following the Iditarod Race with her students, relying on hard-copy newspaper articles a family member sent via USPS from their home in Anchorage, Alaska. Even though “the daily updates” Carol and her students read were often over a week old, their excitement upon opening each manila envelope full of newspaper clippings made every day of the Iditarod Race feel like Christmas. Eventually, Iditarod would go online and the updates would evolve from fans being alerted when a musher and team had safely arrived at the next checkpoint to constant GPS tracking, showing the world the exact location of every team out on the trail at any given moment. 

Friends Forever—Carol, Borage, and me, Spring 2004

The first time I gave a talk for Carol’s students, I placed my parents’ Kodak Carousel 600 Slide Projector on a desk in the multi-purpose room, plugged the machine’s short cord into a long extension cord plugged into a far wall, and aimed and focused the light on a white screen set up on the low stage. Earlier, I’d spent an hour double-checking each of the 70-some slides, making sure each image was arranged in the perfect order for my presentation. I also confirmed the slides were inserted into their slots on the rotary tray upside-down and backwards, assuring each picture would appear on the screen with the correct orientation. I didn’t want any upside down dogs sending the kids into giggling fits—Borage was already enough of a distraction. While I gave my talk, I allowed the gentle, blue-eyed husky to work the room, tip-toeing among the students seated all around me on the floor. 

As often happens in life, during my early days of mushing talks I entered each new school or library worried one thing might happen—routinely, stage fright—and ended up startled by some strange mishap I never could have imagine if I tried. On this particular day, the lights were dimmed, the projector fan hummed in the background, and I stood up front near the screen, giving the thumbs- up sign every minute or so to a student assigned to press the lever, advancing the next slide from the carousel tray into view.

I didn’t think twice when I noticed a group of students and teachers quietly enter the back of the room, place brown sacks and cartons of milk on a lunch table, and sit down. But, Borage did. As soon as he heard the crinkle-crinkle of potato chip bags and Ding Dong wrappers, Borage—with his head held high and his pointy, radar-ears aimed towards the enticing sounds—trotted through the maze of children sitting criss-cross-applesauce on the floor. The kids, excited by the husky’s sudden, animated gait, cheered him on: “Borage! Borage!” 

I couldn’t help but laugh along with everyone else until I witnessed my sidekick flip one of his big paws underneath the curled extension cord and yank my parents’ Kodak 600 Slide Projector straight off the desk. What followed seemed to happen in slow motion. Several quick-thinking students lunged to catch the giant black box in mid-air… but missed. The archaic device hit the hard floor with a cringe-worthy crunch. Upon impact, the plastic carousel ejected from the projector, sending that, too, flying into the air like an unwieldy frisbee. It soon landed with another, smaller crack and my entire presentation—70-some photographic slides—slid and scattered across the polished linoleum.

The crowd went wild as if this mayhem was part of our usual program. Borage adored encouragement—he took off running his free dog laps around the entire room. The more they clapped, the faster he ran. Eventually, one of his paws hit a stray slide and a foot slipped out from underneath his lanky body. Borage did the spilts, his four long legs splayed wide in every direction like a cartoon character with impossible flexibility. 

“Ouch…” the audience winced. 

Borage gathered himself up and came straight to momma, leaning his shoulder into my leg as if he hoped I could help burden some of his embarrassment. 

I rubbed Borage hard behind the ears the way he liked it. Teachers and students were determined to pick up all of the slides and reload them in the carousel but I told them not to worry about it. It took me hours to organize the presentation—we didn’t have that kind of time.

A little girl raised her hand. “I know why Borage is a sled dog!” she declared before I even had a chance to call on her.

“Why?” I asked.

“Because he really loves to run!” she said. “And he really, really loves you…”

I looked down at my partner who was staring up at me. Still panting from his performance, his pink tongue lolled out the side of his grinning mouth. 

They say a picture is worth a thousand words—but, I know, a happy dog is worth a million.

My favorite part of public speaking has always been listening—I love visiting with people before and after our program and hearing their often-emotional or hilarious stories about the dogs they know and treasure. When we were forced to resort to Zoom back in March, I assumed the SCREEN dividing us would seriously limit the intimacy I cherish during those in-person/in-dog presentations. Yet still, we—animal-lovers of all ages—gathered virtually to share something that took our minds off our own situations for a spell. From their own kitchens, living rooms, bedrooms, porches, garages, vehicles, barns, and yards, students and library patrons often joined in our virtual conversation with their own dogs, cats, and a menagerie of other creatures resting on their laps. More than one audience member removed framed photos from the wall or a desk to show everyone in attendance their beloved and dearly-missed dogs. Kids without their own pets brought and held their favorite stuffed animals. With my two dogs, Noggin and Chloe, always snoozing on the couch behind me, the virtual show-and-tell became a relaxing and healing part of our time together that I never would have predicted in advance.

Yes, when Borage and I started “visiting” schools and libraries twenty years ago, technology was totally different. But one thing—the heart of it all—hasn’t changed a lick. 

Dogs are always the same.

Perfect.

If you’re interested in a virtual presentation (Zoom, Skype, etc.) now and/or an in-person/in-dog presentation in the future, please email us anytime using mymusher at gmail.com!

Yesterday, after sixteen-some adventure-filled years together, it broke our hearts to say goodbye to our beloved Romano.

Romano was a good man! He didn’t have a sneaky bone in his body (which, for an Alaskan husky, is really saying something). He was a saint among dogs. He touched the lives of so many. I like to imagine him in Heaven, hanging with all of the humans who adored him—Dwight, Brenda, Mom, Dad—as well as the long string of dogs leading him to the Heavenly smells and sights—Lolo, Borage, and his brother, Stinky, along with the rest of the Cheese Family… and the many other dogs from both the Gilliland’s pack and my own… the list goes on and on.

Thank you, Romano, for being you. 

We’ll miss you… 

Mush, Romano! Mush!

 

 

The print edition of UPROOTED: AN ANTHOLOGY ON GENDER AND ILLNESS is out today.
My essay, “Where We Are,” can be found in Chapter One. Read excerpts from the collection by clicking on “LOOK INSIDE!” at https://www.amazon.com/dp/0692600213/.
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 It’s not easy to write about losing your best friend, but I tried.
I miss you, Mom…

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Tyler Short (L), Karen Land, Steve Brinkworth, and Romano

Laura McCracken, a devoted Iditarod teacher from Northside Middle School, Columbus, IN, writes:

Tyler Short was a Trailblazer last year when he was in seventh grade. He was captivated with the Iditarod and with meeting you and Romano, seeing an actual Iditarod sled and all the gear. Each of his classmates wrote a letter to an Iditarod musher using an address provided via the Iditarod education website. However, Tyler took his letter writing to the next level. He wrote one very good letter and we photocopied it. Then he painstakingly addressed each envelope by hand. He sent a letter to every single musher who provided an address. This came out to be about 60 letters.

During the summertime, he enjoyed checking the mail because he received replies throughout the summer. Seventeen mushers wrote him back. Dallas Seavey sent his Iditarod identification pass, some brochures, and a very kind letter. Tyler also received lots of dog booties and photographs. Pete Kaiser sent a two-page handwritten letter and some booties.

Tyler explains: “I was having a great time learning about the Iditarod and when Mrs. McCracken said we were going to write letter, I got super excited. I was excited because I was actually about to write to a musher! Someone who had actually gone through the Iditarod and knows what really goes on! Then I had the idea of writing a letter and sending it to all the mushers. I talked to Mrs. McCracken and she said that they could pay for the stamps and that’s when the determination kicked in. I actually had a letter done in 20 minutes and sent that exact letter to every musher. It took forever to fill out all the envelopes and sign all the letters.”

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Borage, my beloved husky sidekick and business partner, back in his day… and me looking a little bit younger as well! I miss you, Borage.

2016 will be my 16th year giving Iditarod School Presentations across the country! Contact Karen and Romano now to get on the 2016 talk and/or Skype schedule…

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By Karen Elizabeth Land — originally published on November 22, 2001 in “The Great Falls Tribune.”

 

Barn’s burnt down —

now I can see the moon.

~

— Mizuta Masahide,

17th century Japanese poet

and samurai

 

Witnessing the Montana sunset is a daily ritual for me. Usually as the sun slides behind the last rise, I am watering and feeding the sled dogs, tucking them in for the night. On September 11th, the beauty was overwhelming. The sunset seemed to last forever.

It is hard to imagine anything good ever coming from something so bad. I knew, on the other side of the country, the World Trade Center was burning. The pain and ugliness of the day weighed heavy in my mind as I went about my evening routine. It was the sunset that helped me to see the moment in a new light — a light both brilliant and reassuring. I became instantly aware of how beauty helps us heal and move forward.

We are lucky here in Montana. And I mean really lucky. Natural beauty is such a part of our lives that we sometimes forget it is all around us. We expect to see snow-peaked mountain ranges in the distance, shimmering fields of wheat, clear streams and herds of antelope grazing. I know I expect these things; that’s why I moved here from Indiana seven years ago.

Last week Borage and I returned to Indianapolis to speak in the schools about dog mushing and to attend an Iditarod fund-raiser that family and friends had organized for us. As soon as the news of the “girl dog musher from Montana” hit the media, my poor parents were bombarded with over 160 RSVP phone calls in just two days.

The residents of the city and suburbs were dying to hear and talk about dog mushing, Montana and Alaska, and “the wild.” Keeping my parents on the phone for hours, everyone seemed to be starving for the beauty that is our home here in Montana. They know wilderness exists here in our state and it seems to give them hope even if they might not ever run a team of sled dogs, hike the Bob Marshall, or float the Missouri River.

It was good to go back to Indiana and even better to come back home to Montana.

I have been back East dozens of times since I moved west, but this trip was different. I was reminded of my first pilgrimage to Montana seven years ago to attend school in Missoula. My rusted Chevy S-10 truck sagged under the weight of my entire life’s belongings, my two cats, and my dog Kirby. The beauty and endless space of Big Sky Country was exhilarating. I felt more alive than ever and so thankful to just be here.

Thanksgiving will have more meaning than ever this year. Sometimes it takes tragedy, ugliness, or a trip away from home to show us the beauty in our lives. In the natural world, aggression and darkness are always replaced with peace and light — I take comfort in this.

“The barn has burned down,” but all of us, anywhere in this world, can look up and see the moon.

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On Monday, I took Lolo to the veterinarian. My instinct tells me that my 14-year old retired Iditarod lead dog is not “sick”, but continues to mourn the loss of her companion, Borage. And that her vomiting, acid reflux, and loss of appetite stem from grief and loneliness, not cancer or some other physical disease. Monday morning wasn’t much different than any other since I returned to Martinsdale 3 weeks ago — I fed Lolo just a small amount, she ate, howled for 20 minutes straight, and then vomited her breakfast back up. She looked miserable standing there in the front yard with her head hung low — so alone, and now so sick. I couldn’t put it off any longer. I needed an expert to confirm my diagnosis.

DSCF0269I recognize the symptoms of a broken heart. In the last two years, I’ve lost both of my parents; my good friend and mentor, Carol Meeks; and my dog, Borage. I, myself, have struggled with a long list of ailments such as disturbing heart palpitations, interstitial cystitis, acid reflux, abdominal pain, ulcers, weight loss. These are real medical conditions causing great discomfort. And I won’t deny that I often feel sad, anxious, and alone just like Lolo does. But how do you separate despair and disease? Thankfully, I have the human ability to talk it all through with medical doctors and therapists, and then come up with a plan that can be adjusted along the way. But how do you help a grieving animal?

In my parents’ living room in Indianapolis, a framed print hangs above their couch depicting a dog greeting passengers unloading from a train. My parents loved dogs, trains, and Montana so when we visited Fort Benton in 2001, all three of us were drawn to the story of “Shep.”

According to historians from the Overholser Historical Research Center and the Missoulian, “Shep first appeared in Fort Benton in August 1936 when his owner, an area sheepherder whose name has been lost to history, was brought mortally ill to the St. Clare Hospital. After the sheepherder passed, his body was sent by train to his family back east. Shep was left behind, but for the next 5 1/2 years he lived under the platform of the Fort Benton train station, patiently waiting for his long-dead master to return.”DSCF0555

I think of “Shep” now as I watch Lolo out in the yard, pacing back and forth in front of the gate. The day I realized it was time to end Borage’s suffering and put him to sleep, my lifelong friend (and veterinarian), Dr. Shannon Kiley, suggested that I bring Lolo with me so she could see and smell his body before they took him away. We all knew Lolo would be lost without Borage, but we hoped this might help. I did as Shannon said and allowed Lolo to sniff her mate’s thick fur for one last time.

Sometimes witnessing the death of a loved one still isn’t enough proof that he or she is truly gone. I often wake in the mornings and feel for a brief moment that my parents and Carol and Borage are still here. For humans and dogs, long-term grief thrashes the body with highs and lows. One minute I might finally feel some peace — but then out of nowhere sadness slams me hard from a new direction. I cry. Lolo howls. Sometimes we do it together.

Dr. Katherine Parks, my Montana veterinarian based in Harlowton, declared Lolo to be in amazing physical shape for a 14-year old dog. “She’s so nervous, yet her heart rate is really low,” Dr. Parks noted, impressed with the athletic physiology of Alaskan Husky sled dogs. The thorough exam revealed nothing — the blood work came back perfect. “I would start her on a famotidine for her stomach acid problem. And for her nerves, you could try some anti-anxiety meds. Or try to find her a new friend,” Dr. Parks suggested. “One or all of these things might help… or not.”

DSCF0511In other words, you can never replace a loved one. But for me, continuing to live means continuing to try — I’m not giving up on Lolo. I cry. She howls. We both take Pepcid twice a day. And then we take a hike… our doctors’ orders.